84 funny quotes about beer - the most popular drinking quotes (2023)

Cheap beer tends to bring out the idiosyncrasies of a person. Intoxicated people will say and do things they would never consider doing sober. It doesn't matter if you prefer wine or whiskey, even a pickle, there's something funny about everyone's alcohol-induced ramblings.

Do you like strong beer? Do you like to share your knowledge about craft beers or taste them for fun? In this post, you will find the 84 most popular and funny quotes and sayings about drinking that are both humorous and insightful.

Funny quotes about beer from comics.

“Everyone has to believe in something. I think I'll have another beer.

BATHROOM. fields

"I can have fun like I'm 24, but it takes me almost a week to recover."

Amy Poehler

"Never trust a man who doesn't drink."

BATHROOM. fields

"It was a woman who took me drinking, and I never had the courtesy to thank her for it."

BATHROOM. fields

“My grandmother is over eighty years old and she doesn't need glasses yet. Drinks straight from the bottle. “

henny young

“Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him to fish and he'll sit in a boat and drink beer all day."

jorge carlin

"Beer: helping ugly people have sex since 3000 BC."

BATHROOM. fields

"When I read about the evils of drink, I stopped reading."

henny young

Actors on beer humor

“24 hours a day, 24 beers in a case. Coincidence? I don't think so."

Paul Newman

“Milk is for babies. When you grow up, you have to drink beer."

Arnold Schwarzenegger

"You're not drunk if you can lie on the ground without holding on."

Dean Martin

“Beer is the best drink in the world.”

Jack Nicholson

“Oh, do you hate your job? Why didn't you say that? There is a support group for that. Everyone is called, and they meet at the bar.

Drew Carey

"I have to think long and hard to name an interesting man who doesn't drink."

ricardo burton

fictitious and anonymous

“To alcohol! The cause, and solution, of all life's problems.

Homer Simpson

“Beer before liquor, I have never been sicker; Liquor before beer, you are free.

"Beer has food value, but food has no beer value."

A stranger

“After drinking four Martinis, my husband turns into a disgusting beast. And after the fifth, I completely black out.

Anonymous

Now, son, you don't want to drink beer. This is for dads and kids with fake IDs.

H. Simpson

"Grape or grain, but never both."

See Also

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Homer doesn't do well without beer.

Do beer runs count as exercise?

"Beer will always play a definite role in an individual's diet and can be considered a cog in the wheel of nutritious food."

bruce carlton

Beer Quotes By Historical Boozers

"From the fool and the drunkard you can learn the truth."

modern greek proverb

“Beer is a healthful liquor…it is abundant in nutrition”

dr. Benjamin Rush

"Now we could not have time for further investigation or consideration: our provisions were too spent, especially our beer."

Mayflower Log Entry, December 16, 1620

"A little beer is divine medicine."

Paracelsus, Greek physician

"Beer will get you through the penniless times better than money will get you through the penniless times."

Freddie Freak

"Beer... a tall, potent liquor.

Julius Caesar

"Give me a woman who loves beer and I will conquer the world."

William II

"Whoever serves beer or watered wine deserves to drown in them."

Medieval appeal for pure libations

"An oppressive government is more feared than a tiger or a beer."

Confucius

"Beer, if consumed in moderation, softens the temper, lifts the spirit, and promotes health."

Thomas Jefferson

"History flows in rivers of beer."

Anonymous

"Give my people lots of beer, good beer and cheap beer, and there will be no revolutions among them."

Queen Victoria

"In wine there is wisdom, in beer there is freedom, in water there are bacteria."

Benjamin Franklin

"I'm a big believer in people. If you tell them the truth, they can be trusted to weather any national crisis. The big goal is to bring you the real facts and the beer."

Abraham Lincoln

"He was a wise man who invented beer."

Plato

"Always remember that I got more out of alcohol than alcohol got out of me."

Winston Churchill

"How much beer is there in German intelligence?"

Friedrich Nietzsche

"Observe that the yeast of good beer is better than that of beer."

Kenelm Digby

Writers and drinking bards

“Always do sober what you said you would do drunk. That will teach him to keep his mouth shut."

Ernest Hemingway

"So…and what is civilization if it's not people talking to each other over a fucking beer?"

James SA Corey

"Thirsty, he raised it to his lips, and as the coolness began to settle in his throat, he thanked heaven that in a world of such evil, there was still such a good thing as beer."

Raphael Sabatini

"I wouldn't have thought of eating a meal without drinking a beer."

Ernest Hemingway

"Oh, this beer here is cold, cold and bitter, there's no use coming up for air, drinking, until it's all over - hahhhh."

Tomas Pynchon

"A smart man is sometimes forced to get drunk to spend time with his fools."

Ernest Hemingway

"Nothing tasted better than a cold beer on a beautiful afternoon with nothing to look forward to but more of the same."

hugh hood

"Work is the bane of drinking classes."

Oscar Wilde

"Money, like vodka, can play strange tricks on a man."

Anton Chekhov

“When I heated my house with oil, I used an average of 800 gallons a year. I found that I can stay comfortably warm for a whole winter with just over half that amount of beer.”

david barry

"Whoever simply drinks ginger ale soon loses himself in the conversation."

Pariente Hubbard

"Oatcakes have a delicate flavor when eaten warm with beer."

roberto burns

"Beer makes you feel like you should feel without beer."

Henry Lawson

"Time is never wasted when all time is wasted."

Catarina Zandonella

"And I brought a big pint of stout."

Geoffrey Chaucer

“Beer is intellectual. Too bad so many idiots drink it."

ray bradbury

"What is drinking? A mere pause to think!”

Lorde Byron

"The fact that a believer is happier than a skeptic is no more relevant than the fact that a drunk is happier than a sober one."

George Bernard Shaw

"Here is alcohol: the cause and answer to all of life's problems."

matt groening

"Those who drink beer will think of beer."

Washington Irving

"A good local pub has a lot in common with a church, except that a pub is warmer and there is more conversation."

William Blake

"Beer needs baseball, and baseball needs beer, it's always been that way."

pedro richmond

“I recommend… bread, meat, vegetables and beer”.

sophocles

"Not all chemicals are bad. Without chemicals like hydrogen and oxygen, for example, there would be no way to make water, a vital ingredient in beer."

david barry

Famous And Infamous Funny Quotes About Drinking Beer

"The words of a drunk are the thoughts of a sober man."

Jena Legg

“There is no such thing as bad beer. It's just that some taste better than others.

billy carter

“I spent a lot of money on alcohol, birds and fast cars. The rest I wasted."

george better

"Paintings are like beer, only beer tastes good and it's hard to stop drinking beer."

billy carter

“God made the grass. Man made beer. Who do you trust in?"

kennedy primavera

"If a life of wine, women and music becomes too much, stop singing."

mark shoot

“For their own good, vegetarians should never be allowed anywhere near ales and fine ales. It will only make them loud and belligerent, and they lack the physical strength and aggressive nature to back up any drunken claim.”

antonio bourdain

"The hard part of being a bartender is figuring out who's drunk and who's stupid."

Richard Braunstein

Popular Breweries

"Joy is happiness."

Selo Hop Wallop da Victory Brewing Companies.

"Remember the 'I' before the 'E' except for Budweiser."

A stranger

"A pub is better than a newspaper for public discussion."

Jim Parker, discussing the importance of culture in a healthy pub environment.

Funny singer quotes about beer.

"Alcohol gives infinite patience for stupidity."

Sammy Davis, Jr.

"Beauty is in the hands of the owner of the beer."

friedman curly

"There are more old drunkards than old doctors."

willie nelson

I only fell in love with onebottle of beerand a mirror.

Sid Vicious

"Alcohol may be man's worst enemy, but the Bible says to love your enemy."

Frank Sinatra

“Nothing quenches the thirst like a wheat beer or whets the appetite like an Indian pale ale. Nothing pairs well with seafood like a dry porter or a stout, or pairs with chocolate like an imperial stout. Nothing soothes like barley wine. These are just a few of the specialty beer styles.”

miguel jackson

"There's more to life than just beer, but beer makes those other things even better."

stephen morris

"Drinking beer does not make you fat, but it makes you fat... Against bars, tables, chairs and posts."

the way of Gerard

So laugh, boys, and drink, boys, that will make you strong and strong; All my days I'll sing praises to October stout.

Reginald DeKoven

We hope you enjoyed a strong beer while reading this collection of alcohol-related wit and wisdom. If you have any favorite beer quotes feel free to add them in the comments section below. When you consume beer, it's impossible to be sad, beer makes everything better!